The Pants Situation

    I've lived in big cities for a while now. I understand that trends come and go, and in major metropolitan areas they are often readily on display amongst the masses. After a brief fling with fashion at a younger age, I now find I have neither the time, nor the money, nor the attention span, to follow fashion trends and adjust my wardrobe accordingly. When the grunge-rocker-chic look got big a couple years ago I bought up what I could and keep it going in my own style, regardless of what Vogue says. I do this because I like it, because it fits my personality and my body type, and because I can't get a new wardrobe every season, or even every couple of seasons. So, because I like people watching, and live in a big city, I'm usually aware of current trends, even if I don't follow them.

    Now, the most important thing to remember about trends is that they don't look good on everyone. And, they don't look good on everyone. Also, they don't look good on everyone. In this notion, I think perhaps some of the lovely ladies of Dublin might need a refresher.

    Let's start with an overview of Dublin Female Fashion, or at least the impression that I've gathered over the past few weeks. Firstly, women in Dublin tend to dress more sophisticatedly than women in Boston. Sorry ladies, it's the truth. Boston is notoriously one of the worst dressed cities in the world. Remember The Departed? Pretty sure no one in Southie actually dresses as well as DiCaprio did. Not everyone in Boston is poorly dressed (ahem, I live there) but on the overall, we can do better. So my initial impression of Dublin was that everyone dresses very well. However, the more time I spend here, particularly outside of City Centre (it really is spelled that way), I realize this is wrong. They don't necessarily dress better, just different.

Here's how-

Break It Down:
Heels: Dublin ladies love them some high heels. The latest trend in heels apparently is the platform, which means that not only are you wearing a five-inch stiletto heel; you also have an additional two inches beneath your toes. Because it wasn't hard enough to walk already.

Make-Up: Dublin females and she-males by far wear more make-up than Bostonians. Not just out and about on the town on a Tuesday night (yeah, that's weird, right? Maybe another post discussing nights of the week later). For class, Dublin ladies coat on the mascara, eyeliner, and lipstick. For 10 am classes. For someone who goes to a school where you're lucky if half your class had enough energy to put on real pants and shoes, not pajamas and flip-flops, let alone lip-gloss, this is surprising.

Skirts: This one is tricky. I'm not a prude, and I say if you got it, flaunt it. But if you can't bend over to pick up something without the world seeing what you ate for breakfast, maybe your skirt is too short. Also, sometimes it's cold out. Isn't the risk of hypothermia more pressing than looking cool at a club? No, probably not.

Shorts: See above.

Leather shorts: What are you thinking? I hope you have diaper rash ointment, and nowhere to go in the morning.

Leggings: Not pants. At least wear a shirt that covers your bum.

Pants: Now this is where I really have some contention with the Irish. This pants situation that I've noticed definitely happens in the U.S. but not nearly to the extent as I've seen it here.

    The current big trend is bright colored pants. Okay, not for me, but if you like it, go for it. But also tight bright colored pants. This looks really great when seen in a fashion show and it's on a giraffe stomping down a runway. But in the place I live, the real world, say it with me…. they don't look good on everyone. Ladies, if you wear a fashion trend that does not suit your body type, not only does it look unflattering, it makes you look silly. It makes you look like you have no self-respect and no individual style. Because you look desperate to fit in.

    Guys, if you wear tight, bright-colored pants…you are on your own.

    There are, of course, some very well dressed people in Dublin who, combined with their European good looks, put me in my boot-cut jeans and motorcycle jacket to chocolate binging shame. Then there was the lass on the bus in the shredded tights and short-shorts with a bad bleach job who made me feel a little better. Every city has its fashion extremes, Dublin and Boston included. So while a large number of ladies don their heels and make-up and skirts and head to the clubs, I keep my jeans and flats to go to the pub and hope I can meet other people who agree that leggings are not pants and that maybe leather shorts are a bad idea.